The Redneck At The Bar


A bartender was washing glasses one afternoon when an elderly Irishman came in.  With great difficulty, the Irishman hoisted his bad leg over the barstool, painfully pulled himself up, and asked for a sip of Irish whiskey.

Then the Irishman looked down the bar and said, "Begorra!  Is that Jesus down there?"  The bartender nodded, so the Irishman told him to give Jesus an Irish whiskey, too.

The next patron to come in was an ailing Italian with a hunched back, who moved very slowly.  He shuffled up to the bar and asked for a glass of Chianti.

He also looked down the bar and asked if that was Jesus sitting at the end of the bar.  The bartender nodded, so the Italian said to give Him a glass of Chianti, too.

The third patron to enter the bar was a old redneck, who swaggered into the bar and hollered, "Barkeep, set me up a cold one!  Hey, is that God’s Boy down there?"

The barkeep nodded, so the redneck told him to give Jesus a cold one, too.

As Jesus got up to leave, he walked over to the Irishman and touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed!"

The Irishman felt the strength come back to his leg, so he got up and danced a jig right out the door.

Jesus touched the Italian and said, "For your kindness, you are healed!"

The Italian felt his back straighten, so he raised his hands above his head and did a cartwheel right out the door.

Then Jesus walked toward the old redneck, but the redneck jumped back and exclaimed, "Don’t you touch me!  I’m drawin’ disability!"